January 2012
102 posts
WatchWatch
chels: This is two weeks after D-Day. It’s dark, raining, muddy and I’m stressed. So I get my trumpet out. The commander says, “Jack, don’t play tonight because there’s one sniper left.” I thought to myself, That German sniper is as scared and lonely as I am. So I thought, I’ll play his love song. Courage takes many forms. Sometimes it looks like compassion. 
Jan 31st
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I Just Won a Competition i Didn't Even Know I...
My “Down and Out in Baghdad” story won best on travel writing - Holy Cow! Just got this email from the editor of Playboy, notifying me of the award: Good morning, The North American Travel Journalists Association (NATJA) would like to congratulate you for your achievement in the 2011 NATJA Awards Competition in the “Destination Travel, Domestic Magazine” category! •         Winner – Gold:...
Jan 31st
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Jan 31st
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Separated at Birth (Tech Edition):
Dave Karp (Founder of Tumblr) and really bad comedian Whitney Cummings side note - JESUS CHRIST - HOW MUCH PLASTIC SURGERY HAS THIS CHICK HAD???
Jan 31st
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Jan 31st
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Shep Smith Vows To Eat More Snickers
It seems more people read my tumblr/twitter than I thought. After I posted about the ever-disappearing Shep Smith (My fave anchor not just on Fox News), he told the Daily News: One on-air impression in recent months is that Smith has dropped a lot of weight. “I’ve lost too much,” he says. After years of eating cheeseburgers, Snickers bars and having a generally horrible diet, Smith was told...
Jan 31st
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Jan 30th
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SAG Awards Drinking Game.  →
imwithkanye: mrdavidgordon: I don’t drink, but if I did, I would play this game. Drink every time… A presenter congratulates the nominees and actors in general for all of their “hard work” (or some variation on that.) Someone makes a joke about Ricky Gervais Downton Abbey wins (is it nominated?) Someone jokes about Fassbender’s wang, even though he’s not nominated. The dog from The...
Jan 30th
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With Age, Men May Lose Thinking Ability Faster... →
File under: Things I Felt Like I Knew Already, But Am Now Glad I Have Proof tballardbrown: I post this with no comment. 
Jan 29th
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Something Here Is Not Like The Other - Male...
Did Bradley Cooper get a Chin Job? Bradley Cooper from Sex and the City in 1999 And the Coop now.. Good work, docs!
Jan 29th
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Swedish Explorers Find the Millenium Falcon....
= Swedish explorers found this random object on the bottom of the Baltic Sea. The crack reporters at the Daily Mail have helpfully identified the object. It’s the Millenium Falcon - Han Solo was un-cryogenically frozen just to land at the bottom of the Baltic Sea? WTF? Is there no justice in the universe?
Jan 29th
Jan 28th
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Jan 28th
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Romney's Tax Returns Show How Laws Favor the... →
And this guy wants to be President. Maybe he can get us all offshore bank accounts/tax shelters… who needs paved roads or civil services anyway? kateoplis: From the NYTimes: Mitt Romney and his wife, Ann, made $27 million in 2010. They held millions of dollars in a Swiss bank account and millions more in partnerships in the Cayman Islands. His family’s trusts sold thousands of shares in...
Jan 28th
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The Disappearing Shep Smith...
My favorite anchor (and I’m not being facetious, he’s actually awesome) is taking this gym thing a bit too far… IN the beginning.. 2005: 2010: recently: 3 days ago: It’s like he’s melting away in front of our very eyes…
Jan 28th
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Awesome (ACTUAL) Ideas From The Man Who Could Be...
Sometimes I think Newt Gingrich has forgotten to take his Lexipro…. Actual ideas he’s offered up to help solve the inevitable conundrum of how to spend the American tax payer’s money: 1. Shoot lasers at North Korea (That’ll teach em!) 2. Forget Overcrowding or even over spending - Newt has an idea: MOON COLONIES! 3. Clearly a fan of James Bond movies, Gingrich is...
Jan 28th
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Jan 28th
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The Three Stories That Gave Off A Stinky Stank...
1. Patrick Witt - The Yale University quarterback who supposedly withdrew his Rhodes Scholarship nomination/interview so he could play in the Yale/Harvard game. He now isn’t a Rhodes a candidate, isn’t enrolled (nor graduated from) Yale and isn’t playing in the game. He’s just kind of gone AWOL. so many things about this story stink. No one in the media bothered to ask...
Jan 28th
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Jan 27th
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Jan 26th
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OK, Seriously - That's a Ridiculous Amount Of...
1,500 Pig Nosed Turtles found in Flyers luggage… WTF? This raises so many questions: 1. What kind of luggage was it? 2. How big WAS that suitase? 3. Who knew there was such a demand for pig-nosed turtles? 4. Since they have a pig nose, do the turtles snore?
Jan 26th
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I love how Rush Limbaugh and the Right Is Freaking...
That Warren Buffet’s Secretary gets paid between $200K and $500K. Thats what high level executive secretaries make. Just ask Rupert Murdoch’s assistant… Or Roger Ailes… Or Jamie Dimon… OR ANY EXECUTIVE SEARCH FIRM. At least they’re  being open about it and talking about taxes and actual figures…
Jan 26th
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Kevin Lee and Bobby Trendy - The Same Person?
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, over the top gaysian wedding planner Kevin Lee (the inspiration for Martin Short’s wedding planner on Father of the Bride) kept reminding me of someone last night… and then I realized who it was - Anna Nicole Smith’s old BFF - Bobby Trendy! Ok fine - so maybe personality and voice more than looks.. but still.
Jan 24th
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So I Updated My Page A Bit With Travel Sections
I now have sections for every country I’ve been to and written about (Vietnam, Iraq). Kenya and Mali coming up within the next few days… That way I can condense all the posts and if you all actually want to GO on these trips you can just click on the tabs and it will tell you how to do it.
Jan 24th
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Jan 24th
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Jan 24th
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Jan 24th
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Jan 24th
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It's Messages Like These That Make Me Think I Was...
Let’s be clear: I randomly signed up for one of those things, because, why not? I rarely check it, but it’s there. I’ve never actually gone out on a date from the thing. I have it because… i guess for the same reason I had a pet rock as a child. It’s there. (And this is important): I am fully dressed in the profile pic and don’t talk about sex at all in...
Jan 23rd
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Jan 21st
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10 Questions To Ask Your Favorite Conservative →
stfuhypocrisy: Why is it that when people hoard things, they are a scourge on society and when they hoard money, they are job creators? In fact, aren’t the people that buy things the true job creators? Both the 10 Commandments and the Seven Deadly Sins have no mention of being gay or having abortions. Greed, though, seems to be a biggie. Why do conservatives seem to get that backwards? At what...
Jan 21st
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Fun Fact: the Norwalk Virus is HELL
So I made it out of Mali alive, only to come back to NYC and get the flipping Norovirus…. You know, the thing that people get n cruise ships? (which I have spent my life avoiding). Fun Fact (additional): and this may be useful in my situation in a couple of hours: the correct beat to do CPR to is the BeeGees, “Stayin Alive”….
Jan 21st
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Something Here Looks Suspiciously Like The Other
The royal edition! Crown Princess Mette Marit of Norway: and Callista Gingrich, her evil stepmother: Queen Sonja of Norway (on far right): and Meryl Streep: Queen Margarethe of Denmark: Bob Schieffer (CBS):
Jan 19th
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Jan 19th
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Thoughts From My Pal Dylan on how To Make me more...
10 ways to make Paula more exciting in 2012: 10 Kill a man with your bare hands on network TV 9. marry 13-year-old cousin 8. Stick your tongue in Sam Donaldson’s ear during press conference 7. Disappear into Alaskan wilderness with Knife; return with necklace made of bear teeth 6. Change slogan to “Party with the Freolicker” 5. Answer questions on “Meet the...
Jan 19th
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Jan 19th
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Jan 18th
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Bono At The Esskane Music Festival outside of...
Here’s a couple pf shots of Bono on stage and with his family/friends (sitting by me). Video coming in a second.
Jan 18th
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So Im Finally Back From Mali
And it was… magical. Final photo show below with video of Bono at the Essakane Music festival outside of Timbuktu coming in a second.. Riding Camels in the Sahara: Bono sat by me during the Festival. woot: This dude put the Edge to shame. Seriously rocked that guitar: seriously cool looking Tuareg tribal leaders - a day before they threatened violence against the government at a...
Jan 18th
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